My first group ride

Now, this was a while ago (in 2001) but I think this is worth re-living. Mostly for the point that I have come a long way - and also, because in retrospect it makes a funny story.

Otherwise known as: I-am-on-a-group-ride-and-I-don't-belong-here.

My first group ride. Billed as an "easy" ride, we go slow on this ride, they said. Pretty easy rollers they said.

They lied through their teeth.

I show up. I am a newbie bike rider, and it's cold so I am wearing a fleece. I get a question if I don't have a more moisture resistant jacket. No, I say. I can TELL that my attire is not correct, but it is all I own at this point, so it will have to do.

Starting off, and already I'm panting and huffing. We are riding much faster than I am used to. This is within the 1st half mile. Before we hit the first hill.

It was a HILL da** it! Not an "easy roller!" A BIG HONKIN' HILL!!!

I stick with the group for one... second when we turn the corner and start up the hill, then they ride away from me like I'm standing still. Actually, I am standing still, cause I can't ride up this stupid flamin' "roller."

Time passes. I am seriously suffering here, but I refuse to get off and walk my bike. I think I could have a heart attack right here and die.

Someone comes back to check on me (to make sure that I have not died, I guess.) Finally, hit a downhill and rejoin the group. They pack up the picnic that they enjoyed while they were waiting for me, and we continue.

It is now slightly downhill, so although I am still working like a DOG I am at least staying with the group. Let's not discuss the fact that they are all holding a conversation as though they are at a tea party. I am the only one in pain here.

I get a flat. No, I don't know how to change a flat. No, I didn't know I had tubulars. (I'd had my bike for all of 2 weeks at this point.) There were multiple bike dudes just screamingly ready to change this sucker for me, but they couldn't cause I didn't have any gear, and they all had clinchers. I felt like the biggest bike dork on the face of the planet.
Discussion ensues. (a) we are about 5-10 miles from the cars (b) I have a flat (c) The plan was to continue on and do a longer route. Although I did have a couple of the guys offer to accompany me back to my car (I found out on this day that while you can't ride on a flat clincher you CAN on a flat tubular w/out damaging the rims) - I refused. I already felt like I'd held them up enough and I was so TIRED at this point I could have laid down at the side of the road and taken a nap.

I start heading back to my car. (By an alternate FLAT way, not the "rollers" version.) *THUMP*THUMP*THUMP* It starts raining. Of course, my fleece not being quick drying/wicking/yada yada now weighs approximately 20 lbs. *THUMP*THUMP*THUMP* Because of the flat tire I can only ride like 5 mph, and that is pushing it. *THUMP*THUMP*THUMP* I finally get to the multi-use trail that will go right by my car. It is as flat as a pancake, thank goodness. As I *THUMP*THUMP*THUMP* along, some jogger passes me. I've bonked by this point, working too hard, no fuel, etc. etc. I am so cold I am shivering. The fleece should keep me warm, even though it's wet, but I've used up so much energy that I have no reserves. I'm blinking back tears because I feel so completely out of shape and pathetic.

This was a death ride. This was the toughest ride I've EVER done in my entire life. I would have gotten off the bike and walked, but it would have taken longer and all I wanted was to see my car as fast as possible.

Finally, after years and years, I made it back to my car, drove home, took a hot shower and slept for the rest of the day.

I did this same ride in the spring of 2002. The whole thing. Birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and although I still got dropped a bit on the hills, I too had times where I could have a conversation. I'm not going to say it has been my biggest achievement, but I cannot even tell you how good I felt about conquering this ride that had brought me so low the year before.